Does a high school graduate “succeed” if their transcript includes a C in some classes, a “drop” in a few others but the completion of the credits needed to get them into college? I think so. Does an athlete “succeed” if they used to self-destruct after their first mistake and they now can stay composed at least a wee bit longer? I think so.
Does a golfer “succeed” when they start responding with pars after bogeys on a regular basis? I think so.
We need to redefine “success.” It’s not just for the big victories, the trophies and the academic scholarships. And here’s why.
Without giving ourselves credit for the small gains we make in maturity, focus, mental toughness and trust, I don’t see how anyone makes larger gains.
Who can possibly become more confident without going through a process? Confidence does not just show up on our doorstep and get welcomed into our life. We must earn it through hard work and belief in ourselves and our abilities.
When we swing a club for the first time, we lack much confidence in our ability to hit the ball. When the ball bounds down the fairway a few times, we feel better. The gains are small. First, we whiff, then we shank, then we hit our driver 50 yards, then clean contact.
When we are beginners, we relish the growth and get excited about every gain. When we are more experienced, the gains aren’t relished anymore. Instead we demand perfection. We rarely give ourselves credit for anything less than the best, all the time.
Watch the highest level of athlete and you never see perfection. The best batters don’t get a hit more than 6 of every 10 times. The best tennis players make 5-10 unforced errors a set. The best golfers make regular bogeys. The smartest students still miss a few on a “perfect” ACT.
Life is about small gains. It’s about focusing on them, enjoying them and letting them spring you to the top of your chosen field. What have you done well lately that you can give yourself some credit for? What can you use as a stepping stone to the top? Because you only reach the top of a flight of stairs when the stairs actually raise you up in small gains.
As you can see below, giving yourself no credit for your gains is a recipe for living at the bottom of any stairway to success.
